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| Miranda and her ridiculously hot friend Gary. |
Gary: Look, I just popped in to ask, you're not with anybody or married or anything, are you?
Miranda: Yep, yep. Of course, yeah.
Gary: Really? Kids?
Miranda: Yeah, got two. Orlando and... Bloom. You?
Gary: No, no. Still single.
Miranda: Me too!
Gary: You just said you were married.
Miranda: Divorced now.
Gary: And the kids?
Miranda: Dead.
Gary: Really? What happened?
Miranda: They froze. They froze to death, Gary. It's a funny story, actually. Well. Not funny haha, but funny in that it's almost unbelievable. You see, we were on holiday in the Himalayas at base camp of Everest and they were just running around in shorts and a T-shirt. And I kept saying, 'Put your coat on! You'll catch your death!' And they did!
I watched the entire aired series of Miranda in a day and a half. It would have been less, but I had to work and sleep. Stupid work and sleep, getting in the way of awesome.
Miranda is me. Granted, she's British, seven inches taller, eleven years older, has an incredibly hot friend Gary, and a name that's spelled properly, but still. If I unleashed all of my social anxiety and quirks, I would sound British, grow seven inches, and age a decade quick enough. It shouldn't be too difficult to find myself a ridiculously hot man to pine after, and I suppose I could legally spell my name right if I really wanted to make the comparison complete.
See, Miranda sings in public. Not just little jingles, but entire songs. She dances often. And badly. She lies compulsively (and outrageously) when in the presence of any mildly awkward social situation. Her mother is ashamed of her, her friends are embarrassed by her, and she has to be the most amazing mostly-fictional character ever.
